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6 unexpected things to embrace in your 30s

May 1, 2019 · In: inspiration, life, lifestyle

women turning 30 - advice for growing older - embracing vulnerability - embracing challenges - growing up - faith blog - lifestyle blog - What You Make It blog

There are things that used to make me cringe growing up. Things that made me uncomfortable or downright grumpy. 

Things like waiting in a long line. Actually doing the work to get the results I want. Working out. Eating right. 

Basically, adulting.

I won’t lecture you on the things you should do, because you probably already know. But there are some things that I have kicked back against in the past that I am rethinking now. It is serving me well to lean in to these things and even appreciate them.

women turning 30 - advice for growing older - embracing vulnerability - embracing challenges - growing up - faith blog - lifestyle blog - What You Make It blog

Here’s some things you should embrace more by your 30s.

Your Flaws.

I have spent way too much time in life fighting my flaws. There are two things I’m learning, though: that everyone has flaws (hello!). My flaws do not make me unusual or odd.

And that often I’m missing something when I zero in on my flaws. Like that there’s actually strength and growth to be seen when I step back and look at the bigger picture. 

Vulnerability. 

Who’s seen Brené Brown’s Netflix special? Doooo it. (I also loved her book, reviewed here.) In her work, she cites vulnerability as something we can often identify as a weakness. 

But actually, our vulnerability takes the greatest courage, and connects us to people in ways we never would otherwise. It strengthens bonds, and takes off the pressure to be perfect.

The Process.

Doesn’t it feel like it makes so much sense to rush right to the results? But then that process seems to drag out forever.

The process, I’m learning, is part of the journey, and is nothing to be afraid of. Plus, we spend so much of life going through it, rather than being at the destination.

And it often makes the destination so much sweeter when we’ve embraced the process and worked our way through it. 

Work.

Speaking of work. (But I don’t wannnnaaaa.) 

Seriously, though. It always seemed like, growing up, if something took a lot of work, it probably wasn’t worth it. We’re a very “instant gratification” society, are we not?

Embracing the work means finding satisfaction in the right now, even if it’s hard. Figuring out parts of it that you enjoy, or making the work something you enjoy, makes it even more embraceable. 

Challenging Times. 

I’m often surprised when I find myself facing difficulties again. Like, things should be good. I thought I was doing better. I thought this was a sure bet. Why is this so hard??

Challenging times mold us and grow us. Plus I am convinced that God is even closer to us in times of distress, challenges, and hardships, simply because we need it.

Know that it will come to an end someday, and figure out what you can get out of it right now. Also look for all the ways you’ve grown since the last challenge, and notice the people who come to your aid right when you need it.

Failure.

Why do I constantly see failure as a bad thing? I actually fear it. I’m afraid of how I will look and how embarrassed I will be if (when) I fail.

My husband often says, “fail fast.” Instead of mourning our failure over months and taking a long time to get back up again, fail. See what you can do better. Try again. 

Appreciate it as a learning opportunity, rather than an enemy. It makes a big difference. And truly, the people who fail a lot and “fail fast” are the ones who end up being the most successful. (See: Thomas Edison and Abraham Lincoln as just two examples.)

What are some things that life is teaching you to embrace a little more? 

women turning 30 - advice for growing older - embracing vulnerability - embracing challenges - growing up - faith blog - lifestyle blog - What You Make It blog

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For the one who knew all the answers in Bible triv For the one who knew all the answers in Bible trivia…

The one all the parents made their kids invite to their birthday parties (because you were the “good example”)

The one who carried a Bible in your backpack and wore your WWJD bracelet to school

The one who self-censored all the songs and movies

Are you in for your era of healing, expansive faith?

You’re not alone in the de/reconstruction journey. Follow along for more. 

#deconstruction #faithjourney #spiritualgrowth #theology #christianliving
Today, on Ash Wednesday, we remember we are made u Today, on Ash Wednesday, we remember we are made up of tiny particles, star dust, breathing in and sustained by the very Spirit of God. 

We are limited, finite, temporary, beloved, chosen, made perfect by Christ, and being made holy and whole.

I didn’t practice Lent or the liturgical calendar growing up, and I’m finding such solace in it in recent years. This intentional time is to lament, be still, go slow, and embrace surrender and sacrifice. 

At the end of the day, I can show up in the presence of God as all that I am, and not be too much or not enough. Same for you.

May you find comfort in these thoughts today. Do you practice Lent? 

#faithjourney #holyspirit #spiritualformation #godwithus #womenoffaith
Even though I would have told you all day about Go Even though I would have told you all day about God’s goodness, I didn’t really believe God’s goodness applied to ME.

Promises like, “for my yoke is easy and my burden is light” (Matthew‬ ‭11‬:‭30‬ ‭NIV‬‬) or “there is no condemnation in Christ” (Romans 8:1) drove me crazy.

(TL;DR: comment below for a link to a free Bible study on promises of God.)

Why? Because even though I knew them by heart, they didn’t feel real to me. More often they did for other people, people who were free and confident in their faith, but not for me.

Here’s what changed: I started holding tightly to the promises in God’s Word, by reading them and choosing to believe they applied to me (even if I didn’t feel like it). 

I meditated on those verses, copied them down, used them to contradict the lies in my mind—and they started to take root. 

It wasn’t a quick hack and didn’t happen overnight. It was a constant practice of choosing to take God at his Word, to believe I wasn’t the exception to his promises.

What if you could find that kind of confidence and security? I wrote a 30-day study of Biblical affirmations and promises to start re-framing your perspective, with some simple prompts.

Let me know below, and I’ll send it your way. 

#biblestudymoments #biblestudytools #godsword #godspromises #faithjourney
Saturday I was able to serve at a women’s event Saturday I was able to serve at a women’s event by being part of a prayer team. That meant intentionally praying with people, for people, and over the event. It was heavy, but oh so meaningful, so holy, to sit with others in their pain. It was a privilege.

Sometimes you’re the person who needs prayer, and sometimes God gives you the words to pray with someone else.

But we’re all going through a lot right now. It’s okay to be shaken. It’s okay to be grieving. It’s okay not to bypass it for the “faithful answers”. (If you’ve been around here for a while, you know we’re no longer about right answers.”)

As I was wrestling through this myself, feeling shaken in my faith, I kid you not, these scriptures sprang to mind. They met me, and I hope they meet you too. 

#bibleverses #godsword #walkbyfaith #godwithus #jesusfollower
In light of some recent conversation about empathy In light of some recent conversation about empathy, 

here are 4 things I learned about compassion when writing my book She’s Not Your Enemy, ones that shocked me to my core:

1. Out of all his attributes, God is called compassionate over and over again in the scriptures. The New International version has 81 verses with the word “compassion”. All but nine refer or relate to God or Jesus. 

2. “Compassionate” is the first word he uses to introduce himself as he passes by Moses—“the Lord, the Lord, the compassionate and gracious God…” - Exodus 34:6 NIV. The first things he wants to be known for? His compassion and graciousness towards us. 

3. The Hebrew word for compassion (rachum) shares a root with the Hebrew word for womb (rechem). God’s compassion for us is deeply personal and intimate, a miraculous mystery, the closest relationship, a connection not unlike motherly love.

4. We use compassion and sympathy and empathy interchangeably, but they’re actually different. 

Sympathy is a mental understanding of someone’s pain;

Empathy is knowing the same hurts or a similar feeling to them; 

Compassion is going through something with someone, sitting in the pain with them, feeling what they feel. In Latin, it literally means “to suffer with”. And that’s who God is.

Not only is empathy not a sin, but God takes it a step deeper to actually walk through our pain with us.

They’ll tell you compassion is a trick.
But your compassion makes you look more like your Creator.
❤️

#empathymatters #compassioninaction #walkwithgod #faithjourney #godwithus

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