ways to support and encourage your husband

 

You may notice it’s so easy in the first few months to years of marriage to encourage your husband. It’s all heart-eye emojis and sentimental love notes for a while. It’s silly grins and hand-holding and playful banter. Sure, there might be some fights. But usually at the end of the day, you’re his number one fan.

But as your marriage goes on, it gets harder to purposefully build up your spouse.

Life gets more hectic. Job demands don’t slow down. You’re hanging out with other couples. Maybe kids enter the scene. You forget, you take things for granted, you just get cranky.

The past couple of weeks, I’ve had more chances than usual to show my husband support. Our anniversary was a couple months ago. He is teaching a class at church, and I can’t stop telling people how hard he is working on it, or encouraging them to sign up. He gave a lesson, and he did an amazing job.

Let’s make this happen more often.

And not as an afterthought. It’s part of my job as a wife, and even as a mom. And I want that. I want my husband to feel respected, admired, seen, and heard. Because he’s great and he deserves it.

Plus I want my kids to see me build up their dad, not tear him down, or worse – be ambivalent towards him. It helps them respect their dad, gives them an example of building each other up, and helps them become more encouraging and supportive individuals themselves. 

James takes notice in a big way when I support him. He feels the respect and love when I make a conscious effort. And I want him to feel that way all the time! He deserves it.

Here are some ways to support and encourage your husband:

• Talk about him in a positive way – whether he’s there or not.
• Thank him for the chores he takes care of, even the simplest ones.
• Brag about his achievements to others, especially since he probably won’t do it himself.
• Support his hobbies, talents and skills. Show up and cheer him on.
• Ask for help with something he is good at.
• Buy him a favorite treat, just because.
• Ask questions about life, or how a certain project (personal or professional) is going. And just listen.
• Tell him how great he is, in the spur of the moment.

Finally, bonus points! Here are some things that my hubby says encourage him, straight from the source:

• Giving full attention (without the distraction of a cell phone, TV, etc)
• Doing things that take care of our family
• Hearing his requests and taking care of them

These are just a few ideas. What can you think of that encourages and builds up your husband? Sound off below!

Photo Credit: 

1 – Heather Mount on Unsplash